#i hope this is okay :’)

[brokentripod]

Dyke Nukem

What video game would benefit the most from swapping the gender of the protagonist from a boy to a girl (don’t say all of them that’s cheating)

Master Chief and Cortana would be infinitely more compelling if it was yuri

[thjsrots]

best of both worlds

࿐ ࿔*:･ﾟ vi x cait x reader

; warnings: threesome, some degradation/praise, pain inflicting (just a bit), strap, face riding/69, virgin reader, kinda taken captive?, top!vi/cait x bottom!reader, also this one is a little long

This was it. You’d really gone and done it this time. You found yourself roughly thrown on the ground, cuffs itching tightly around your wrists as you struggled under Caitlyn’s grip. Everyone in Piltover stared as you continuously fought back, getting absolutely nowhere. This woman was stronger than she looked, that’s for sure.

“Let me go! I didn’t even get to do anything!” You exclaimed, voice a little strained.

Cait laughed sarcastically, clicking the cuffs in place as she leaned over to you, speaking into your ear, “Didn’t get to do anything? So you admit it, you were trying to steal from this home before I so rudely interrupted you?”

Her voice stabbed into you like a sharp, hot knife. What kind of a fucking idiot just gives themselves away like that? You, that’s who. You couldn’t help it though, you always had word vomit when you got nervous. Especially when a hot woman had you pinned, cuffed, and was so close to you that you could smell her lingering perfume. Her knee dug into your back as she spoke, making you wince in pain. You turned your head to meet her eyes, and that’s when you saw her expression. She was watching, smirking, almost like… she fucking liked it.

“I— Well, that’s not what I meant!” You started, furrowing your brows at her as you felt her knee pressuring deeper into you. “O-Ow, what the fuck?! That hurts, let me go!”

You suddenly felt the relief of Cait’s knee moving away as she gripped onto your wrists and pulled you up, standing you on your feet. You were filthy now, dirt covering your face and clothes. She turned you around, examining your face as her eyebrow arched up.

“W-What are you looking at?” Your face scrunched with disgust, you were sure she was mentally judging you. Her eyes grazing you up and down, slowly, began to offend you. “I said, what the fuck are you—”

“You’re coming with me.” Cait replied, ignoring your question as she cut you off. She quickly turned you back around, held tightly onto your arms, and led you away. You still struggled as you walked, wriggling around in her grasp.

“Do you people see this? This is abuse of power! I did absolutely nothing! There’s no proof! Fuck the enforce—” As soon as you two turned the corner, her hand slapped over your mouth, making you recoil at the pain. You let out some muffled, “Fuck you’s”, “Let me go’s”, and her personal favorite, “You sadistic fuck!”.

“You call this sadistic? What a laugh,” Cait said, smirking to herself. “You have no idea what’s coming for you.”

Her words sent a jolt of chills running down your spine. What did she mean by that? Did she plan on torturing you? Keeping you locked up for life? You wished you knew what her plan was, but all you could do was sulk in your own defeat and continue to struggle. Then, suddenly, the world went dark. She’d wrapped something around your eyes, you entered panic mode.

“Help! This bitch is crazy!” You exclaimed, desperately shaking your head to try and remove the piece of cloth tied around your head. Cait groaned with annoyance, stuffed another piece of cloth in your mouth to shut you up, and pushed you forward to continue walking. You stood your ground, heels digging into the ground.

“Maybe, just maybe, if you shut up I’ll think about taking it easy on you. Got it? Can you do that?” She harshly whispered in your ear.

You thought about it for a second. It would be in your best interest to stay quiet in the long run. You sighed, almost defeatedly. “Fine. Whatever.”

You two walked for almost ten more minutes. You were growing tired and irritated, but you kept your mouth shut for the whole way. You finally entered a door, went up some stairs, then was thrown into a room. You hit the cold, hard floor with a splat.

“Ugh, fuck! What the fuck?!” You exclaimed, rolling around and lying on your back, pain all throughout your body.

“Vi!” Cait shouted, her footsteps growing closer to you. You shot up, got on your knees, and shook your head around once again, trying to get the cloth away. You figured whoever this ‘Vi’ person was could help.

“Violet, I have a surprise for us!” She said, kneeling down to meet your face. “Ugh, Gods, you’re a mess.” You felt a cold dampness on your face, making you flinch and move backwards. “Stop moving! I’m trying to clean you up.”

Clean you up? What the hell was this crazy bitch going on about? Why did it matter if you were clean or not, what was she about to do, sell you?

…Was she really about to fucking pimp you out?

She held your arm with one hand, tightly, and cleaned your face with the other. You heard footsteps coming up behind you, making your head snap to the side.

“Hey, cupcake, what is it—” The voice was cut off by the sight of yourself, you assumed.

You heard Cait slowly stand up, her voice sounding like she was smiling brightly. “Happy Valentine’s Day, Violet.”

Happy Valentine’s Day? You confusingly stayed there for a second, in silence, before your stomach dropped. She really was pimping you out. You were frozen now, from fear, confusion, and… another odd feeling you couldn’t quite describe yet.

“Caitlyn, this might be the best gift yet.” Vi said as she made her way towards you, kneeling down in front, close enough to where you could feel her breath on you. Your jaw dropped at Vi’s reaction, expecting the complete opposite.

“I—I don’t know what’s going on. I’ll stop being a menace, okay? Y-You could even send me to jail for a couple days! I’ll take the punishment! We can work this out, can’t we?” You asked, smiling nervously.

Cait giggled, making her way down towards you as you felt her hands go past your ears and begin to undo the knot that held the piece of cloth together. “This is your punishment. One I decided would be best for you, and us, of course.”

The cloth finally fell off your face. You winced at the brightness, blinking as your eyes slowly adjusted to the room surrounding you. The first thing you saw were the two women, knelt down in front of you. One red headed, muscular, grazing her eyes up and down your body. And then there was Cait, smirking as she reached over to force you up.

“N-No!” You yelled out, making your body go limp. Cait caught you just before you hit the ground, rolling her eyes.

“What a child! Get up, now!” She demanded. You did no such thing, if anything, you tried your best to make your body heavier.

“Don’t worry, I got it.” Vi said as she grabbed your waist and threw you over her shoulder. You wiggled around, flailing and kicking your legs, screaming as loud as you could.

“No one will hear you, brat. Stop kicking, it’s fucking annoying!” She said before slamming you down on the bed. You gasped as she did so, pushing yourself back until you hit the wall, eyes widened and darting back and forth between the two women standing at the foot of the bed. They looked at each other, smirked, then walked around and sat on opposite sides, trapping you in.

You gulped hard. “What… What are you two gonna do?”

“Whatever we want, darling.” Cait said, scooting closer to you. You tried to move away, but on the other side was Vi, scooting in closer to you as well. “Tell you what. If you’re a good girl for us and do as we say or please, you’re off the hook.”

Your eyes lit up for a second. “R-Really?”

Cait nodded, holding her hand up and flashing the key to unlock the cuffs. “I’ll even uncuff you right now.”

You contemplated as you stared into her lustful eyes. Your gaze wandered towards Vi, who was impatiently waiting for your response.

“Say yes, we’ll take good care of you.” Vi said, her words making the bottom of your stomach a little warm. You weren’t sure if you believed that. Although this seemed like a nightmare at first, these two women were… stupidly sexy. Although you’re a virgin, you knew this time had to come eventually. And if it had to happen with anyone, you’d definitely choose these two.

You sighed, looking back at Cait. “Fine. I’m all yours.”

The two women smiled at each other before Vi tugged you forward by the shirt and Cait undid your cuffs. You flushed a shade of pink as you were almost touching noses with Vi, blinking quickly. “What is it, cat got your tongue?” She asked, smirking.

“Oh, she was hard to handle before now! A real loud mouth. Don’t play nice now, darling, show Vi the trouble you gave me.” Cait said as she began to pull up your shirt. You hesitated before lifting your arms, leaving you in your lacy bra. You blushed, looking away as the two women admired your body.

“Lace?” Vi asked, slipping a bra strap down, slightly exposing your nipple. “Looks like we have a slut on our hands, cupcake.”

“Looks like we do.” Cait replied, snapping your bra off and quickly pulling it away. Your breasts bounced as she did so, making a breathy gasp escape your lips. Cait made her way around you, the two women staring at your breasts now. You blushed, squeezing your arms next to your them, looking away in embarrassment.

“Look at her, trying to perk them out for us. She’s a slut alright.” Vi said as she harshly groped the right one, your head quickly snapping back at her touch.

Cait gripped onto the left one, fondling your nipple with her fingers. A sudden, soft moan escaped your lips. You froze. She snickered, eyes lowering. “I think she likes this, Vi.”

Vi tugged on your right nipple, making you whine out in pain but also with a deep, hidden pleasure. Her mouth suddenly met your bud, making your back arch. “W-Wait!” You said, but Vi did not wait. She sucked as her tongue circled around it. Cait wasted no time before her lips met the other nipple, doing the same. Their hands wandered your body, feeling every part of you they could. These women were hungry. You could tell they wanted to fucking devour you.

And for some sick reason, that turned you on.

Your head flew back as you moaned, hands resting on both their thighs, squeezing when as sucked harder. Vi slowly grazed her hand down your stomach, undoing your pant button as her mouth moved to the side of your breast, biting and sucking on it, leaving bruises all over it. They pulled away, pushed you down, and shimmied your pants off, leaving you in nothing but a lacy, black matching set. Your face was red hot. You wore lace to help your confidence while stealing, never expecting anyone to actually see it. Especially not two people… at the same time.

“All dressed up and ready, huh? I wonder…” Cait hovered over you, whispering in your hear, “Did you secretly want this? Did you look to provoke me, to provoke anyone who would possibly give you the time of day? How fucking desperate are you?”

Vi hovered over to the next ear. “I think you’re really desperate. So desperate, that I bet you’re soaked under those whore panties.” Her hand trailed down, lower, even more lower, until she reached the hem of the lace. Cait kissed down your neck, biting harshly, making you jolt and whine. Vi’s hand suddenly made its way in, immediately greeted by the wetness gathered up inside the panties. “Fuck, you’re so wet…” Her finger accidentally slipped against your clit, which was already swollen, making you moan.

“Cait, her cunt is practically begging for us. Come ‘er, feel.” Vi said, pulling her hand out and slipping your panties off. Cait made her way over as Vi spread open your thighs, propping your legs up.

“H-Hey! Stop!” You pleaded, to which they ignored.

“Oh, my…” Cait said, her finger poking your entrance, making your juices drip down your cheeks. You gasped, thighs immediately opening up more without thinking. “Look at you, so needy and drippy.” Her finger slurred its way inside, sharply and without hesitation, causing you to grip onto the sheet and gasp loudly. Although it was only one finger, you’d only ever felt your own inside yourself, so this feeling was completely new. Then, another digit was inserted. This one was thicker, stretching your hole out as it entered. Your eyes darted over to see both Cait and Vi’s fingers inside you. At the same time.

Your face twisted up in a wince as you cried out, “Ow! Ow, ow, that hurts!” They did not care. In fact, they probably got off to the fact that it hurt. They pumped their fingers, same pace, in and out. You let out struggled moans, your hands reaching down and clawing at theirs as they fucked your poor virgin cunt.

“Fuck, she’s so tight.” Vi said, staring deep into your hole as it clenched around her finger.

“A little too tight, don’t you think? Could you be a… virgin?” Cait suggested, eyebrow raising. The two women began to pump their fingers faster, excited at the thought of them possibly deflowering you.

“Y-Yes! Mmh! I am!” You struggled out, your face red hot as you admitted to it.

“Oh.” The two said at the same time as they looked at each other, their lips curling into a smirk. They pulled their fingers out, letting you finally be able to catch your breath. You laid there, panting, watching. They both slammed their lips into each other, sloppily mixing their saliva. You watched, biting your bottom lip. You felt a heat growing inside your hole as you watched the two women making out. Their hands groped and tugged against their clothes, slowly pulling them off one by one. You were aching now. You needed something.

You needed them.

Your hand made its way down your stomach, pressed onto your clit, and began to circle around it. You groaned out as your other hand pinched your nipple. Vi’s hand reached down into Cait’s panties, her finger prints showing the movement she made against her clit. They both moaned, Cait digging her nails into Vi’s muscular back. Her eyes opened slightly, side eyeing you as your finger twirled around your clit. Your eyes followed the trail of saliva connecting to their lips as they pulled away. You whimpered, spreading your legs open for her to see. She poked at Vi, whispering for her to look at you. She did so, eyebrows raising from surprise. They crawled back on the bed, hovered over your face, and smushed both their lips onto yours at the same time. Your moans were muffled now as their tongues fought with yours, pushing against one another. You wanted them more than ever now. You weren’t sure why you were against this at first, because this was your wet dream come true.

Just as you thought that, they pulled away and you were suddenly thrown over Vi’s thigh, ass up in the air. She tugged onto the back of your hair, forcing you to look at her. You yelped out in pain, “Ouch! What the f-” A hard slap landed on your ass cheek, face grimacing at the shocking pain. “Owww! S-Stop!”

Cait gripped onto your ass, shaking her head. “Cursing at us still? Why do I keep having to deal with you? This is supposed to be your punishment.”

“Who told you to touch yourself, huh?” Vi questioned, her hand harshly landing on your ass.

You jolted, crying out, “I-I’m sorry! I won’t do it again!”

“I don’t believe you.” Cait whispered, opening your thighs up, a slap landing right on your cunt.

“A-Agh!” You cried out, eyes swelling up with tears as you stared at Vi. You hoped she’d have pity on you. She stared into them, holding your face and squishing your cheeks.

“Tell Cait you won’t trouble her again.” Her heavy hand landing on your pussy, making you flinch.

You nodded, sobs bursting out. “I-I won’t bother you again!”

“Now apologize to her like you mean it.” Vi said, squeezing your face harder. Your tears were all over her hand, lip quivering.

“I’m sorry, Cait! I’m so sorry, please forgive me! Please, I-I’m sorryyyy!” You cried out, the stinging sensation inside your thighs beginning to throb. Although it hurt like hell, you couldn’t help but notice the dripping coming out of your hole. Cait spread open your cheek, staring at the wetness as it landed on Vi’s thigh.

“You… you like this?” She asked, a little surprised. She rolled her eyes and sighed. “Fine, let her go. Doing all this whining but you’re sopping wet.” Vi threw you off, landing face up on the bed. Cait began to slip her panties off. Her bra then popped off, breasts bouncing above your face as she did so. You blushed, staring at them. You were still a sniffling mess, yet you couldn’t stop staring at them. Your hand twitched, wanting to reach up and fondle them. You guessed she noticed, because she suddenly gripped onto your wrist and led your hand to her right breast. You gripped onto the softness, her nipple hardening under your palm. You had absolutely no idea what to do other than grab and squeeze, again, being a virgin who’d done absolutely nothing sexual in her whole life.

“Jeez, you really don’t know what you’re doing,” Vi started, her hand suddenly covering yours as you both groped Cait’s breast. She was now guiding your hand, making you pinch Cait’s bud. She flinched a bit, moaning out as you did so. You bit down on your bottom lip, cheeks flushing up. “See? You can’t be scared of ‘em, how would you ever get any if you are?” She said, snickering at your awkwardness. You both fondled her for a bit before Vi pulled your hands away and held them down.

“Since you’re a virgin, and it shows, I guess I’ll have to do all the work.” Cait said, her legs beginning to straddle over your face. Your eyes widened so much, you truly thought they might fall out of your face. You stared at her glistening slit, which was just a few inches away from your face.

“What—What are you—” Your sentence was cut short by Cait’s cunt sitting on your face. “Mmh!!” You muffled out, not quite sure what to do as her thighs squeezed against your face.

She sighed. “Open your mouth and lick.” You gulped and obliged, your tongue slowly poking her clit. She groaned as you began licking up and down. Her hips began to move back and forth, fucking your face and making it harder to breathe. “That’s it, good girl.” She then stuffed her clit in your mouth. “Suck on it.” Your lips surrounded the bulging skin and you sucked while circling your tongue around it. Her back arched, hands holding the top of your head as you did so. Your own hands wandered up and held onto her breasts, doing exactly what Vi taught you.

“You’re doing so good, aren’t you?” Vi’s voice suddenly broke the sounds of Cait’s moans. You then felt something poking your hole, sliding up and down along your cunt. Your legs froze, muffled moans escaping your mouth and vibrating into Cait’s wetness. Then you felt it. Something large and thick entering your hole. Your hands squeezed against Cait’s skin, your face twisting up as you whined from the pain. “Let’s see how good you can take the two of us then.” You could feel your wet hole taking the toy well, sliding in slowly. Your walls were tight around it though, making it hard for it all to go in. Vi muffled out a, “Fuck, so tight…” before pushing it all the way in. Your back arched, pain flowing through waves all throughout your body. Tears ran down your cheeks, leaving stains where there was once dirt. You let out a muffled groan as Vi slowly began to move inside you, pushing your legs further back.

“Just relax, angel. It’ll feel so good soon, you’re taking me so well already.” Vi said, stroking inside you as her thumb met your clit, circling around it. It started to hurt less now, the pain slowly turning into intoxicating pleasure. Cait continued to rut against your face. All three of you moaned, noises overlapping each other. Your moans sounded different now, they were hungry. You’d never heard yourself make those sounds before. Cait then suddenly lifted herself up, turned around, and sat on your face. She lowered herself on your body, staring at the dildo as it stretched out your cunt. It made a squelching noise every time Vi moved.

“Look at you! Our slutty girl, hole all nice and stretched. Does it feel good?” Cait asked.

“Y-Yes! Feels so—so good!” You managed to struggle out, gripping onto Cait’s ass. It was hard to speak due to the constant groans you couldn’t control. You suddenly felt her tongue flicking against your clit, pushing her ass back into your face. Your eyes rolled to the back of your head, tongue grazing Cait’s cunt once again. Vi was pounding into you now, hitting that spot that made your toes curl over, and over, and over. You felt a tingly feeling starting in your lower stomach, growing stronger and moving lower. Your legs began to shake, moving your face up and down against Cait faster. Her moans sped up, gripping onto your thighs.

“Just like that, darling. Gods you… you’re gonna make me come…” Cait said, her lips surrounding your clit as she sucked.

“Are you close, huh?” Vi questioned, slapping the inside of your thigh, the tip of the toy grazing your g-spot. “You’re a shaking mess.”

“Mmhm! Mm!” You said, bucking your hips back and forth.

“What do you think, cupcake? Do you think she deserves to come?” She asked, her pace slowing down. You whined as she did so, pushing yourself back onto the toy.

“How greedy. She expects sweet release after being arrested, what lesson would that teach you, hm?” Cait said, pulling away from your swollen clit and slapping it. Your head shot back, gasping loudly.

“Please! I won’t ever steal again, I-I’ll be the best citizen! Be the best girl for you both! I’ll do whatever you two want me to do!” You pleaded, sobbing into Cait’s cunt as you pushed your tongue into her hole, flicking back and forth. “Mmh.. please, please, please!”

Cait threw her head back, moaning loudly. “Fuck… fine. Since you sound so cute while pleading.” She lowered herself onto your clit again, picking up her pace as her tongue pushed against it. Vi held onto your waist, forcing your whole body to take her strap. She used all her force to pound into you, so deep inside that there was a bulge where it continuously hit the top wall of your pussy. The room was loud, filled with moans, grunts, and the sound of a squeaky bed. You felt Cait’s clit twitching inside your mouth, pushing herself deeper into your face. These two were gonna be the fucking death of you.

“Yes, yes, yes!” She moaned out, coming on your face. Her juices dripped down your jaw, landing on your chest. You suddenly felt a sharpness all throughout your body. Your back arched as far as it’d go, nails digging into Cait’s plump ass.

“V-Vi—Cait!” You yelled out, feeling the warmth of release spread across your inner thighs. “I’m coming!” Your eyes rolled back, loud moans escaping your mouth, drunk off of the two women getting off to you.

Vi continued to fuck you, making you cry out from the sensitivity. Her head suddenly was thrown back, moaning out loudly, “Fuuuck!” As her own orgasm creeped up onto her, filling her boxers and strap with her creamy cum. She pulled it out, took it off, and landed on your right side. Cait pulled away, landing on the other. The three of you laid there, panting, sweaty skin touching.

“You… You two okay?” Vi asked, sitting up and looking at you and Cait. Her hands reached out, stroking both your cheeks.

“Yes, I’m more than okay. Are you?” Cait questioned, her eyes darting to you as she sat up. They were both staring at you now, eyes full of worry. Vi wiped your tears away as Cait stroked your hair. You smiled at the two women who were suddenly caring for you. You wondered if they’d grown fond of you in the couple hours you three spent together.

“Yeah,” You said, out of breath still. “Happy Valentine’s Day.”

[minsvnshine]

@paletmblr event xxx: [ period drama ]

if your feelings are still what they were last april, tell me so at once. my affections and wishes have not changed, but one word from you will silence me forever. if, however, your feelings have changed, i will have to tell you: you have bewitched me, body and soul, and i love--i love--i love you. i never wish to be parted from you from this day on.

pride & prejudice (2005) dir. joe wright

[saintzweig]

gym teacher! patrick moodboard & headcanons

– thank you for 400!!! this is long overdue but i just had so many ideas for it, i had to write them all down. all hail gym patrick teacher anon. slightly proof read idk also i just kinda went ham on this so apologies if it's very out of character or slightly different from the ones i've posted before.

ꢾ꣒ the first time you saw patrick, he's walking down the hallways beside the principal. a very casual fit, jeans and shirt, because he doesn't have much going on in his wardrobe. (having sold his expensive clothes to afford gas and food)

ꢾ꣒ you were asked to give him a tour so when you were introduced, his first thought is how much you give miss honey from matilda vibes.

ꢾ꣒ your personality wasn't far from it as well– selfless, passionate and caring, everything he wasn't and hadn't witnessed in years.

ꢾ꣒ you've heard about him, of course. the teacher's lounge was filled with excited since the news of pro-tennis player patrick zweig coming to work in their local school.

ꢾ꣒ when you gave him the tour, he seemed a little jittery and ended up overcompensating with jokes and compliments. which he knows definitely weren't the right things to say but it's his first job, an actual job that he felt he had no qualifications for.

ꢾ꣒ you were understanding though, didn't judge him so quickly which he was extremely grateful for.

ꢾ꣒ he quickly got on well with the students because well, he's young, cool and funny. he was definitely not that great when it comes to paperworks and lessons during his first few months at school but he learned eventually.

ꢾ꣒ the students love calling him mr.z because they somehow end up butchering his last name plus he thinks it's very validating when teens think you're cool enough to give you a nickname.

ꢾ꣒ he loves making the kids play dodgeball because it's brutal lol

ꢾ꣒ he would always come by your room during short breaks, shamelessly sticking his hand in the fishbowl filled with candies for your students.

ꢾ꣒ he would always try to sit with you during lunch in the teacher's lounge because he claims you're the only sane one besides him. he'd ask questions about you or tea on the teachers...

ꢾ꣒ you tried putting distance between the two of you at first because you're professional and have boundaries and he's ... patrick and new. but you soon realized how fun and comforting being in his presence is. you love your job but dealing with kids five days a week is stressful and he helps make it bearable.

ꢾ꣒ during assemblies, he'd always stand next to you with his arms crossed. pretending to watch over the students and keep them behaved but in the end, he's the one who ends up misbehaving by trying to make conversation with you, he's not that good at whispering.

ꢾ꣒ he'd always say hi, compliment your clothes or pop into your classroom to rile the kids up and annoy you. he'd come up to your desk saying he has something important to tell you but it's all nonsense, and it's only when the door closes behind him that you noticed the post-it note he left on your desk. "dinner?"

ꢾ꣒ things start to escalate more when you two were tasked to chaperone a field trip. on the way back, everyone's knocked out including you. he lets you rest your head on his shoulder, his hand itching to grab yours and keep you close.

ꢾ꣒ he'd tap you awake when he notices you're getting closer to the school. dazed, you lift your head up. accidentally just centimeters away from his. after realizing you've just been staring into each other's eyes, you both look away with a light shade of red dusting your cheeks.

ꢾ꣒ after that moment, he'd try to convince the other staffs to plan a work dinner or a night out just to get close to you and talk without all the awkwardness.

ꢾ꣒ he'd be rushing to sit next to you, doing everything to keep your attention on him. he's handing you the things you're asking for, putting more food onto your plate, refilling your glass.

ꢾ꣒ by the end of the night, you mention how you were planning to uber home but he insists that he drives you, to be safe. and he definitely didn't plan for it because his car is a mess, he opens the door to the passenger seat and tosses a bunch of stuff to the backseat before stepping aside to let you in.

ꢾ꣒ you ask him if he wanted to go for post-night out burger before driving you home and of course he's not going to say no to more time with you.

ꢾ꣒ you get your burger and fries then he drives you to a small cliff he found when he first moved here, telling you the story of how he ended up in this town in the first place.

ꢾ꣒ he was surprised to see you tearing up, you say its because he's gone through so much and found the strength to start over again but he's downplaying it, saying he's sure other people go through much worse

ꢾ꣒ and you're like, no don't say that. you're valid, everything you've gone through is valid and i'm so proud of you for striving to be better (miss honey mode activated.)

ꢾ꣒ his heart swells, staring at you with a surprised expression because he hasn't heard that in so long, that someone was proud of him.

ꢾ꣒ fast forward, you're sharing a cozy apartment after you proposed being roommates, saying rent in this economy is really bad and with your pay, you're not sure how long you're gonna be able to keep a roof over your head. it was hasty, sure but it felt right. now you've made a home together.

ꢾ꣒ he gets up atleast half an hour before you, kissing you on the forehead before getting up to brew some coffee. you two live such a domestic life, different from what he's had before you.

ꢾ꣒ on weeknights, you get a lot of take out– mostly chinese, indian and thai because you have so much work to do. sitting together to prepare lessons or grade papers.

ꢾ꣒ if you're not busy, takeouts while rewatching sitcoms (i feel like he watches full house or b99). sometimes you'd play recordings of his games and he thinks you're doing it to embarrass him but really you love tennis era patrick.

ꢾ꣒ during the weekends, you would either go out (outside the city) and explore, hike maybe or just walk around. or you would stay in and make a full course meal together, with candles and music.

ꢾ꣒ you agreed (mostly you) to keep the relationship a secret for a while and he knows how important keeping your personal life from your work life separate is to you so he respects that. and also because you don't know how workplace romance is perceived at work so better safe than unemployed.

ꢾ꣒ he drives the two of you to school so you make him wait ten minutes after you go in before he can. after work, he'd drive over a few blocks from the school and wait for you there so people don't see you going in his car.

ꢾ꣒ he tries to act normal, like you two are just friendly coworkers but he can't help going out of his way to touch you or talk to you. sliding past behind you when you're in the lounge to place his hand on your back. standing beside you and touching your arm with his when you're making coffee. secretly holding your hand under the table when you're sitting down for lunch.

ꢾ꣒ the two of you think you're so slick but literally everyone can see that you're flirting, you're in your honeymoon phase– constantly smiling and whispering to each other, blushing instantly when you make eye contact from across the room. you're not very subtle.

ꢾ꣒ while hanging out with other teachers, someone casually mentions your relationship with patrick and you're like, "huh? what relationship? we're friends" and they're like girl cut it out, we're not idiots.

ꢾ꣒ patrick is so relieved to know that they know because he's tired of (badly) pretending that you're just a coworker. he wants to be able to tell and show people that he's yours and you're his.

ꢾ꣒ the students, of course, find out eventually and being teenagers, they're shameless with their teasings. wolf whistling and squealing whenever patrick would interrupt the class to tell you something (which you know he does on purpose because he's an annoying little shit).

ꢾ꣒ he loves giving you flowers and buying you books, massaging your feet after a long day, setting a bath for the two of you to relax in. his love language is quality time and acts of service.

ꢾ꣒ he couldn't believe how different the life he's living right now from the life he used to have. he's living in a stars hollow-esque town, has a proper job that's not about tennis and has a beautiful partner he comes home with.

ꢾ꣒ he can't wait to marry you in a church and raise a family with you, have kids that will eventually go to your school and he'll teach :")

[milliesfishes]

hii same anon again! feel free to ignore if you don’t want to do this ofc - but a perfect lake day with coryo but then you can tell something’s off. he then finally tells you about how he was reassigned to district two and doesn’t have any choice but to go and you two are both so heartbroken. and then maybe having to actually say goodbye? :’) guess i want to cry lol

⋆౨ৎpeacekeeper coryo breaks up with you⋆౨ৎ fem reader x coriolanus snow

Coriolanus’ lips found your fingers clasped with his hand, and you smiled slow and soft like sunlight. His other arm was resting lazily over your hips, the weight a comforting thing as his chest supported your back. It was perfect. Everything about it was perfect.

Truthfully, you loved every allotted day off he spent with you. It was a treasure amidst a sea of mundane days filled with labor and exhaustion. He smoothed every rough spot for you, made every ordinary trouble melt away.

Turning in his arms, you let your cheek fall against his chest, the metal of his dog tags cool from your time in the lake. Many a time you had fallen asleep with the rectangles pressed to your skin and awoken with his blood type imprinted there.

He let you move against him, quiet and stoic as always. Today in particular he'd been reserved but you assumed it was stress, not minding the lack of talk. Only when you were settled did he adjust his arms, one large hand splaying over your bare back. You hadn’t bothered to redress, and nor did he.

It was funny- a month ago he would have had his clothes on immediately after drying off, wary of the surroundings of nature he was so unfamiliar with. Now he sat upright, not against the tree like anyone from town would have done, but it didn’t matter. As long as you fit between his arms nothing else mattered.

Picking at the blanket underneath, you murmured, “I hope it can always be like this.” A bird’s whistle carried from the trees, flung out into the expanse of the glassy lake. His fingers stilled where they had been roving up and down, causing you to look up at him, meet his stormy blue eyes.

Right now, they were filled with thunderclouds of oceanic magnitude, and you sat up straight, brow knitting. Was he upset? Worried about something? "Coryo?"

The lake lapped calmly at the pebbly shore, the opposite of the mass of dread circulating and hardening in your chest. It was a buildup; you knew it was. He kept your fingers laced with his when he murmured, "I'm being transferred."

It felt as though someone had shoved you off the edge of something dark and looming, and now your body was flailing helplessly, plummeting to the jagged rocks of the unknown. Hovering clouds darkened the spot of sunshine you'd been lying in, and goosebumps rippled over your arms.

"Transferred?" You could only manage the single word, trying to leave out the accompanying emotions. Your efforts were in vain.

He gave a single nod, and you let out a little breath, looking away. The only that could have shocked you more than meeting was him leaving you. He'd looked so out of place that first night at the Hob, as if he didn't know what to do with himself.

It was hardly the same man staring back at you now, the lines of his face stiffened.

You sat all the way up, moving closer to him, knees pushing his thighs further apart. He took your hips again, trying to get you to stay still, but you refused, determined as ever. Framing his face with your palms, you searched him desperately. "What do you mean by transferred?"

"I took the advancement test. I passed. Now they want to send me to Two."

Your poor heart began to ache all over again. Every word from his mouth was eating at it like sugar to a rotting tooth. "Two."

"Sweetheart." He gently held your wrists, pulling your hands away from his cheeks. The more you looked at him the more you hurt. But you'd never been able to tear yourself from him yet. Though your time with him had been brief, Coriolanus had quickly become your favorite person, the only one you wanted to be with. You wanted a sea of endless nights cuddled to his chest, or under his arm at the Hob. Gent's girl is what the other Peacekeepers called you, lifting their bottles and grinning.

Tears began to prick your eyes. "You never even told me you took the test."

"I didn't know they would ship me out," he said with an edge, swallowing. "I thought maybe I'd be promoted here and get to stay. But they want me somewhere else."

"You're leaving me." It felt so selfish to say it that way. The man you loved was escaping the mousetrap of District Twelve and you were condemning for it. In all honesty, this was a chance you knew you would have jumped at had it been you.

Coriolanus breathed out through his nose, and you suppressed a chill both from the temperature and the look on his face. He didn't reach for you, letting you have your space as you tried not to cry. It was only when the first crystal drop leaked from your eye that his hands found your waist, pulling you back into his chest.

Your tears soaked his chest, and you took in sharp breaths, trying not to go hysterical. It was bad enough that he was comforting you when you were supposed to be excited for him.

All you could think of were the things you would miss. The barely-there lilt of his lips whenever you said something sweet or funny, The feel of his hands on you. Soft confessions he made when it was dark in your small home save for a candle, kissing your forehead when he left to get back in time for curfew. The way he kissed- like he'd been hungry his entire life and only you could satiate him.

A choked little sob bubbled up and darted past your lips when you realized exactly how alone you'd be when he was gone. Family long passed, being with him had been the closest you'd felt to home in a long while. Where do you go when your home is a million miles away?

To the bed he'd held you in, you gathered. To the places he used to be. It would be a measly substitute for what you really wanted.

"I'll write you," he promised, adjusting the daisy he'd plucked and put in your hair earlier. His body was growing taut, and you knew he was fighting internally as much as you were. "We'll...it'll be okay."

Maybe somehow you had always known he wouldn't be here forever. Given his origins somewhere that may as well have been universes away, you knew he wasn't destined for life in a place like this. With the simplicities you had learned to make enough.

You could almost see the path the future embroidered before you. Crinkled letters under your pillow because that was the closest you'd get to holding him again, hours emptied of his presence. It drained you like a rainy day, and you slid your arms around his torso. His chin dropped to your hair, one hand at your waist and the other fingering the strap of your damp crocheted undershirt.

A plea for him to stay nearly rose on your lips, and you lifted your head, wishing you were brave enough to say it. But you knew nothing could stop it now. The echoes of your desire were fading into the background as he breathed in through his nose, pressing his forehead down onto your head.

The way he held you spoke volumes, and you mentally penned it to remember for late. Your wet hair had been sticking to his chest like seaweed, and he brushed it behind your shoulder. "I...I'll miss you." Though his voice was steady, you could hear the cracks in the foundation. "I love you," he was really saying.

You allowed yourself one final sniffle before lifting your head, cupping his cheek and pressing your lips to his. His warm fingers found the nape of your neck over your hair, just holding you there until you pulled back. "I'll miss you too," you breathed, twin tears trickling from your eyes.

Ever since you knew him, you had watched the mask he'd worn as a young man from the Capitol chink and crumble away. Perhaps he had realized he didn't need it here. Not where humanity was in its barest bones, the natural world a pure comfort. In a romantic way you knew it was you too. You gave him all you had in the way of love, unearthing the undeniable fact that he cared for you that way too.

Coriolanus' hands found your cheeks, and he kissed you once more in a way full of longing. He searched your eyes, letting his forehead lean against yours. In that moment he looked almost desperate, matching you. Without closing his eyes, his lips pressed to yours in the tiniest of pecks. "I love you."

Maybe that would keep you warm at night when he was nothing but memory.

[lovelucilfer]

self indulgent fluff for my beloved husband's birthday!! after worrying that I wouldn't have anything to post for him, I somehow managed to write this. I love him and he deserves nothing but softness. happy birthday to my favourite uchiha. 🍅🍙💙

The first thing Sasuke notices when he wakes, sitting up as he blinks the sleep from his tired eyes, is the unusual absence on your side of the bed. It's rare for you to rouse before he does, but a press of his hand to the sheets and the warmth still clinging to them tells him that you're not far. Though he already has a sneaking suspicion as to where you've disappeared to. One that makes a fond smile tug at the corners of his lips as he gets up.

Instead of going about his morning routine as he usually would, Sasuke wanders out from your bedroom, padding carefully down the hallway towards the kitchen of your home. This is where you are, he's certain of it — if the sweet, resounding hum of your voice and clattering dishes are anything to go by.

Sure enough, as he breaches the doorway, leaning against its frame, there you are. The sight of you makes Sasuke soften, his muscles going lax as he refrains from making his presence known just yet. You're still in your pajamas, hair thrown up into a haphazard bun to keep it from falling into your eyes as you cook. He takes his time letting his heavily lidded gaze roam over you, appreciating every curve and inch of your exposed skin as you work; the crook of your neck, the inviting slope of your shoulder, and your bare thighs. All favourite places of his.

Sasuke knows that you know what day it is, and the thought that you've gone out of your way to wake up earlier than you typically like to in order to make him breakfast has warmth spreading through his chest. The small ways in which you show your love for him, and choose to celebrate him, never going unnoticed. His fingers twitch with want as he pushes himself from the door, tempted to reach out and pull you close as he splays them over your skin.

"You're up early." Sasuke murmurs, startling you with the low rasp of his voice, a hint of amusement in his tone as he watches you turn your head to look at him with pleasant surprise.

His name falls from your lips at the familiar sound, breathy and affectionate, and a smirk tugs at his lips in response as he quietly closes the distance between the two of you. Sasuke's hand finds your hip to give it a gentle squeeze in greeting. Dropping his head to nose along your neck, he breathes you in before brushing his lips against your shoulder.

"I am," you confirm, a giggle bubbling up from your mouth as Sasuke's hair tickles you, "Go sit, it's almost ready."

Sasuke hums, reluctant to pull away from the comfort of your body heat, but moves to seat himself at the kitchen table as per your request. He knows better than to argue, and he wouldn't want you to think that the effort of your doting gesture has been lost on him. It's quite the opposite, as he gazes at you there's nothing but unadulterated love in his eyes. You can see it too, suddenly feeling shy as you set his food down in front of him. It isn't uncommon for you to make breakfast, but something about this morning, knowing you've made it especially with him in mind has it feeling extra special.

When Sasuke glances down at the plate before him on the table his heart squeezes in his chest. All of his favourites are included, prepared undoubtedly with love and care, but there's one thing in particular that has an unexpected rush of emotion catching him off guard. Cherry tomatoes, that you've somehow managed to slice deftly into the shape of small hearts.

You worry at your bottom lip as you arrange your own breakfast, skimming through your mind for anything you could have missed while you wait for the telltale sound of Sasuke's hum of approval. It's a sound you've become partial to, taking pleasure in it whenever you get the chance to cook for the both of you. But it doesn't come, and you can feel the weight of Sasuke's gaze, the silence eating away at you as your pulse quickens with concern.

"Is it too much? It's silly... childish, I know—" you stammer, shaking your head as heat starts to rise to your face in embarrassment, turning to look at him only to be met with the hard plane of his chest, "Mm!"

You're interrupted by the firm press of Sasuke's lips to yours, his hand finding the small of your back with practiced ease as he circles your waist, scooping you into his embrace as he kisses you. It's all-consuming, the kind of kiss that steals your breath and has you chasing after his mouth once he pulls away — as is every kiss Sasuke initiates, you've found. You flush at the sudden proximity, melting at the feel of his hot breath fanning out over your lips as your own hands come up to cup his face instinctively. Brushing your thumbs along his jaw, your eyes search his, filled with love and longing.

"It's perfect." He insists, his voice carrying a warmth and tenderness saved solely for you as he dispels your worries, "Thank you."

Sasuke's words are saturated with sincerity, his gratitude evident as he punctuates them with yet another deep, fervent kiss. He feels your arms slide up to wrap around his neck as he captures your lips, revelling in the way that you arch into him, even as he pulls away to study your delicate features. Several moments pass as you peer at one another, time seeming to suspend itself as the two of you bask in the intimate exchange.

"Happy birthday, Sasuke." you tell him finally, your voice dripping with adoration as you brush the hair from his face, wanting to look at him fully.

It makes Sasuke's heart skip a beat, fluttering in his chest as he peers down at you with a soft reverence that speaks volumes to the depths of his love and appreciation for you. Seeing the same love reflected back at him in your eyes, he can't help but to smile. He knows that in that moment, every birthday from here on will be a good one, so long as he gets to spend it by your side.

[thesilvertheorist]

• nsfw drabble - first time •

REQUEST: anon asked -

"five hargreeves first time hc/drabbles? 🥹"

warnings/tags: mdni (this is a smut drabble!), five's body and mind are 18+ here (don't be creepy), virgin!five, fivexfem!reader (lmk if people want a masc!reader ver.), PiV sex, unprotected sex (do as I say and not as I write - use protection!)

Masterlist

enjoy?? teehee - i'm open to doing another version of this, more like a fic, hmu for details

° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° ° °

okay so, five is obviously VERY timid when it comes to romance and intimacy on all levels... he just doesn't know what to do, like at all. he's just so clueless. he's spent years working for the commission, visiting sleazy places just to kill people who obstructed the timeline corrections. he never really knew what to make of knowing people were 'boning'. he usually gets utterly disgusted by the thought of sex - not realising that he just didn't understand what it meant if it were to happen with a partner he actually trusted to look after him...a partner he trusted to treat the delicate parts of him with care...to treat his soul with care. so when you came into his life, and your relationship began to progress, he was pleasantly surprised that the thought of sex no longer disgusted him - but ONLY if his thoughts were focused on having sex with you. he's uninterested in other people at the best of times - its obvious he's a devoted partner in all aspects.

the two of you would have had conversations about sex before, elaborating more about when it felt like the right time and when you would feel comfortable taking that extra step. five is meticulous about everything, he ensures to never overstep a single boundary of yours, not even once; just as you'd never overstep one of his. he is so deeply emotional about the fact that you treat him with respect and listen to what he's telling you. he shows that respect back a trillion times over. this, however, does not mitigate the natural progression of a human relationship. you two have hormones and urges which need answering.

the two of you will be sharing an emotionally intimate moment, holding each other and relishing in the comfort that the other brings. you'll feel five relax underneath your touch and really let that harsh outer persona drop. you bring him in for a kiss, a loving one, one that expresses deep feelings of devotion and adoration. over the course of your relationship with five, he's learned so much about how to love up on you. his once inexperienced kisses are now exactly what you need from him. his once tentatively shy hands are now planted firmly on your waist, funning themselves over your hips and up into your hair. five never really thought he'd need more than this from you...but something in him has shifted and today - he needs it.

you'd urge five to get comfortable, knowing that this is going to be much better unrushed and truly appreciated. he'd lay next to you, feeling you pull him back in for another kiss, and then another one...and another. this moment would progress until you're both left gasping for air. you'd both just explore each other with an overwhelming feeling of love, almost tearjerkingly. you'd touch him as if he were made of glass - as if he'd shatter beneath you, because he feels like he just might. every touch you give him sends shivers up his spine and blood away from his brain. he's so delicate. you'd break apart from him to caress his face, fix his hair, and lock his gaze. whilst looking at him you'd see everything he is: insecurity, obscurity, and immense bravery. he'd searching your eyes for what comes next. as he's so friggin out of his depth when it comes to anything physical...or emotional for that matter. you'd assure him that he's safe with you, peppering kisses on his face as you whisper your affirming sweet nothings over to him, feeling him begin to relax again.

five would have no idea what's next. obviously he knows the basic principles of sexual interaction...but never had he put thought into the logistics. before he could spite himself at the gross oversight, you'd interrupt his train (wreck) of thought by asking him if he wanted to keep going. he'd be completely taken aback by your question - so confused by it. had he made you feel like he didn't want to continue?? you'd see the panic start to set in and reassure him that you're asking for his sake and not yours, affirming to him that he has the option to say no. and that'd be when you clocked them...tears. five wouldn't be able to stop them, hell he wouldn't even know they were happening. he would just be so damn emotional about someone actually (wholeheartedly) giving a shit about him - enough so to give him the option to say no [five does not realise that this is the bare minimum as he's never felt love...okay carrying on], enough to ask him how HE felt.

he'd basically fall to pieces into your arms and babble endlessly about his love for you and how he wants to take this step with you - and only you. he'd want you to take care of him. you'd take his hand in yours as you began to trace down his body, removing clothing as you went, five slipping back into his shy little shell that he knows all too well. i feel like he'd need you to watch him intently to pull him back out when this happened - showering him with kisses on the places on his body he doesn't like (which is basically everywhere because he has immense dysmorphia). he'd return the favour for you, removing your clothes and instead covering you in his words of devotion and love. that's when you'd notice his inexperience come back to him. he'd have no idea on where to touch you - no clue on how to make you feel good... but you'd take his hand and (quite literally) show him.

you'd lead his hands to where you felt best - feeling his hands brush against your breasts to feel across your nipples (his mouth would water at how soft you felt and how delectable you were), you'd lead him down to your core, giving him access to your wet heat. he'd lose it when he touched you there, dropping his face into the crevice of your neck. the feeling of your slick, the warmth of your cunt...it would all overcome him and he'd endlessly run his fingers up and down your folds, committing the sensation to memory whilst also losing his brain entirely. this is where he'd need you to step in, to take the lead for this one. he's so used to having to be in complete control all the time...he'd need you to control this for him - to tell him how this is meant to go - to make sure he knew he didn't need to think through this...to let him be authentically himself.

i feel like he'd want you to cover him, he'd be on the bottom whilst you made yourself comfortable on top of him, making sure to drown him in affection as you both adjusted to the feeling of being like this with each other. five would be putty in your hands, letting you love him wherever you needed to, whenever you needed to. he'd gasp when you took his cock into your hands, stroking it gently, milking the precum from him. he'd curse his body for the eagerness of his reaction - feeling as though he may end this before he'd even got chance to start it. he'd want this to last for as long as humanly possible... he'd whine out incoherent whines of desperation as you swipe his tip across your folds, gathering letting your wetness drip down him, preparing him to enter you. he'd throw his head back when you would tease his tip at your entrance, circling it, threatening to enter and then pulling away. he'd grab at you, needing to ground himself from being sent sky high with the blood rushing through his veins.

you'd look him in the eyes as you took his hand in your own, finally allowing his tip to enter you. and he would fall to fucking pieces. he'd not break your gaze for a single second, but his mouth would be slack-jawed and he'd have no words - the only sound coming out of him would be a silent scream of pleasure at the feeling of you encasing him. you'd slide onto him slowly, letting both you and him adjust to the sensation of being joined in the closest place imaginable. once fully seated, you'd allow five to break your gaze and his head would loll back, falling limp as his breath hitched and his cock twitched inside you. you'd had an inkling that this meant that he wouldn't last long. hell, he'd have been holding it for ages already, forcing himself to hang on for this specific moment, a moment that pleased you both...a moment that pleased you.

you'd rise up slowly and feel him panic when he thinks his dick is about to fall out of you, seeing the terror in his eyes as his head snapped back up - relieved and yet astounded when you'd drop your hips back down and take him back into your cunt again. you'd see his eyebrows crease and his eyes screw shut, notice how his ribs flare and his his breath would hitch with every movement you'd make. you decide to let him feel it, to lead him through it, to let him finish.

[five beneath you, quivering with pleasure] "hhaaaah, don- don't know if i can-" "okay, five, it's okay. i've got you," you'd assure to him once again, squeezing his hand that you'd been holding since before he entered you, "it's okay, baby, let go. let it go for me, i've got you" he'd connect your lips in an urgently wet kiss, needing to feel as much of you as possible and show his love for you, breaking it only to gasp and whimper as he felt the coil inside him snap. "oh god- i love you, i love you so fucking much, can't stop, oh-" "i love you too, five... let it go for me, that's it-" you'd speak out as you felt your own pleasure rise and snap along with him, mixing your love together in the deepest part of you.

you wouldn't stop moving against him, only slowing your pace so he'd have chance to come back to his senses. he'd never want to leave you. you'd feel his cock soften slowly inside you and you'd stop moving altogether, resting against him, tangling your free hand in his sweaty hair. he'd whisper endlessly about his love for you, relishing in the fact that you - the person he adored most in the world - had just made him feel nothing short of fucking euphoric.

he'd be utterly offended when you lifted yourself up off him, attempting to summon the strength to keep you there but his muscles would certainly betray him and he'd pout about it, blood coming back up to his brain and reinstating his usual arsey attitude. he still wouldn't object to you pulling him into a close cuddle whilst you brought him back to reality. he'd wonder if he did well for you, feeling like he may have disappointed you until you'd whisper to him about how good of a job he did, laughing slightly about how he's certainly a quick study. you'd feel him release a content sigh before dropping to sleep in your arms, feeling safe, feeling loved, feeling wanted. oh and he'd definitely be all over you the next day, wanting to shower you with affection, feeling closer to you than ever before.

[roucaelum-art]

Twiyor month: Day 27: n s f w

[softcryz]

I dunno if anyone's curious, but I have been making more Wawa (and co) emotes in the background! I usually only make em for myself/out of boredom, but then I remembered that about a year ago I posted a few of them, so I thought, eh, why not!

Especially considering this one's a redraw of one of the first three! The wawa heart one! Now with two versions, one to match with Creativity and one with the original colours :]

I'm not good at these, but they're fun to do and relatively stress-free <3

[the-dark-parade]

WARNINGS! THIS STORY CONTAINS... angst + fluff + lilia×fem reader

A/N: Dear souls, my apologies. I have not finished the previous fic yet, and I'm already starting in the next. For the moment, that is paused. Yet again, I hope my work pleases you. If you are not comfortable with this, feel free to leave. If you would like a version with male reader instead, please request it. Likes, comments and reblogs are very much appreciated.

(inspired by @solxamber so you should def read their stories)

Now, the parade completely skips its first destination, and goes to the second!

Part 1,

THE RANT. and how hell began

(if only I didn't read that story...)

-----

"So girlie pop, have you SEEN the new fic going around lately? Like I've been going cray cray over it, and I swear, it's worth it!" My friend gushed, then proceeding to send you the link to it on AO3.

You internally rolled my eyes, already knowing that it's definitely going to be shit. She always does this, recommending you things that are 'top tier' just for them to have 0 kudos or comments other than the one she gives.

You sighed, thinking of just humoring her...

You hoped for the nth time that this wasn't another one of those random shitty fics she found in the sea of fanfictions.

So you clicked open the link.

And guess what you found?

You found the one, the only, (well not the one and only, but you get the gag) the shittest fanfiction of shit fanfiction.

Not the shittest of the shittest, but the writing kinda was.

There were spelling mistakes and bad grammar and usually you would be fine with that. As an experienced A03 and manga reader, you already prepared yourself for such things. But there was at least one. Every. Ten. Words. Or less.

It drove you crazy. And don't even get started on the plot.

Magical fantasy. It's a magical fantasy, you get that right? And by the way, it's medieval. Not that it's a bad thing, you love that troupe!

(live laugh love medieval novels)

BUT.

BUT!!!

Why... WHY WERE THERE FUCKING BOMBS AND MECHANICAL ENGINEERING BLOODY TANKS AND NUCLEAR BOMBS?!?!

Like what the fuck-

Ahem.

Anyways, the main gist of it was that you have the POV of the main character whose name is not even mentioned at all! At all!!

Like you'll think there would be at least 1 scene where it pops out but spoiler alert! It doesn't.

And he's called, what, the Knight of Dawn? The Dawn Knight?!

What kind of cringy-ahhh name and title is that?!

Like okay man, I get that you're being emotionally manipulated by Mr. Humpty Dumpty fatty pants WHOSE NAME WAS EVEN MENTIONED.

"Henrick Istvan" more like a Hen-ick isn't van. Simply disgusting.

You just have to applaud the author's skill for writing horrible characters.

Manipulator, ugly, fat (not fat-shaming he's just that ugly and fat), too ambitious, etc etc etc.

The Knight of Dawn - you're just calling him KOD cause why not - life was absolute hell.

For this guy and his guy, he fought the faes. He went head on to fight the faes and battle in the war as the war commander on the first lines.

He fought, trained, sharpened his weapon, cut down his enemies, maybe some spicy times with his wife, but that was all.

His personality was so...

He forgave Humpty Dumpty for disrespecting and guilt tripping him so many times, so much that you would puke rainbows and sunshines like he was in the story by now!

Classic "too kind and innocent" main character.

All in all, that book was absolutely shit. It was so repetitive, yet you couldn't stop myself from clicking the next chapter.

Well, you suppose there was another reason too, and that said reason was how the chapter flipped to the faes point of view every few chapters.

They were.. much, much, much crueller than the KOD.

But it was natural, knowing they were the villains in the story.

Yet your heart couldn't help but to get drawn to them every word, dynamic, expression and behaviour they said and did.

You may have gotten obsessed with the right hand man of the main villain herself, but switching topics...

And what came next was absolutely jaw-dropping. And not in a good way.

After the tanks came, soon they made a bomb.

A BOMB.

A LITERAL, ACTUAL, BOMB.

And of course, the enemies were wiped out.

The book ended anticlimactically.

The buildup, the plot devices, everything!

All gone.

Man, what was the author thinking?!

And then the story ended there.

RIGHT THEN AND THERE.

From that, you had gotten SO ANGRY that your blood pressure spiked, and-

...

...

...am I dreaming?

This is an unfamiliar ceiling.

A/N: dear souls, stay tuned for part 2! Thank you for reading if you read.

[joffyworld]

Fitting Out, Falling In

The zip of the clothes,

The story thus goes,

Lips tight and tied closed,

As the lamb's plans unfold,

Those arts most bold;

Those artisans untold,

Now lost to the story,

Now known to one soul.

The significance lingers,

In the nimble young fingers,

The history hinges,

On they who now sows.

From wool that unfolds,

The hope of the sole

Last lamb of the flock,

Last God of the world,

Their partner in crime,

He who started decline,

He who waits for the time,

That the lamb's plans are told.

Presented an outfit,

Casted in gold,

Embroidered in silver,

And pressed with the woes;

Of a dead generation,

The truth now unfolds,

Survival of history,

Woven into clothes

(Inspired by @olrinarts's WIP Fittings comic series)

[i-may-be-an-emu]

Some of my favourite out of context sfth ao3 tags because these are so funny (also all of these are from different fics)

Disclaimer that these aren’t mine :)

[stillnotyourmusebitch]

Release date for the royal Stobotnik au fic?

Im aiming to get the first chapter out no later than Thursday.

It's just been taking me a little longer time as I am a perfectionist and edit the ever living shit out of my fics to ensure the flow and wording is just right to invoke all the emotion and feelings I feel about the current project are protrayed correctly. I want this fic to be exactly what I see in my head to spill onto the page.

I want everyone to see it through my eyes.

It will be posted via ao3 and I will post the link on here as well and tag all the people who have asked to be tagged.

So please bear with me. I'm working very hard on it.

Also, my cat Ziggy has been impending a lot of my progress, hence Thursday post date at the latest.

[sophsicle]

kyd chapter 24

[boombambaby]

[ @mercsandmonsters liked for a starter from here ! ]

Somewhere in the near distance, the haunting howl of a wolf calls, and a chill runs down his spine. This time, it isn't from the chill in the air, and it's with that realization that panic finally sets in.

"Wait! No, no, no, no! Stop!" Kuzco rushes forward, stumbling over roots to put himself in front of the flannel wearing lumberjack, and he holds his hands out to try to bring the towering man to a stop.

"Look; Sam? It's Sam, right?" His tone is placating. Near pleading. "Sam! You can't just leave me out here like this!"

[starrylevi]

hello, can you do headcanons about Levi having a crush on a shy reader. She/her pronouns plz, thank you ~

💫 He first notices you in a group setting. Everyone else is speaking but you. It intrigues him since everyone is always so eager to show off.

💫 When you’re first introduced to him he can tell you’re intimidated by him and he doesn’t know why (at first) but it upsets him.

💫 Levi would admire you from afar at first, watching you and your mannerisms. He notices how you try not to take too much space, how it takes you a while to jump into conversation but even when you do jump in you don’t say much. He observes you more than he should.

💫 Levi tries to treat all of the scouts equally but he can’t. He’s cold to literally everyone else but you. He can’t just treat you like anyone else, especially when you’re you. Not with your sweet face, your pretty eyes, your bashful smile….he’s a sucker.

💫 When you’re in the room, Levi does his very best to not look at you. Because if he does, he won’t be able to stop. But one day he slips up and just gazes at you. He takes in the features of your beautiful side profile. You must have felt him because you quickly glance at him, one eye widening before averting his gaze. He doesn’t miss the light pink that tints your cheeks after the brief interaction.

💫 He stands up for you whenever you need it. You don’t even have to ask him. Someone’s being mean to you? Someone made an inappropriate joke? Someone’s not listening to you? The captain makes sure you’re taken care of.

💫 When you both end up being in the same room the man is terrified. But he keeps on making his tea as if you’re not even there. He doesn’t want to freak you out. That is until you ask for the sugar that happens to be next to him. He panics internally but he passes it over to you, not wanting to look you straight in the eye because he doesn’t want to make you feel uncomfortable.

💫 The man watches you a lot and he hates it, he feels so creepy. But he’s observed you so much that he knows when you’re having trouble learning something new or are having trouble getting the hang of something but you’re too shy to ask for help, he’ll pretend to act like he’s just walking around when he notices you struggling. “How’s it going, soldier?” You’ll quietly tell him the issues you’re having and he’s quick to help. It happens often enough that if you lock eyes with him, he knows to go over to you.

💫 He tries not to touch you unless it’s absolutely necessary. He doesn’t let anyone touch you either, unless you’re okay with it. How does he know if it’s okay or not? You’ve gotten comfortable enough with him to have an unspoken agreement. His gaze will meet with yours and he can tell if you’re fine with something by a subtle expression or a slight nod of yours.

💫 He puts you on his squad so he can help you develop your skills comfortably (and the closer you are, the easier it is to protect you).

💫 He knows you hate asking for things but he would do anything you ask him to, within reason. If your gear needs to be repaired or you need a new uniform, he makes sure he sees to it.

💫 He’s careful with how much he pushes you during training.

💫 You trust him more than anyone else and he doesn’t take that responsibility lightly.

💫 Your quiet and shy demeanor activates his protective nature. He has an innate need to protect you all of the time. It consumes him all day, everyday. And he loves and hates it.